Experiencing Film

Tonight I’m watching the 1961 film The Children’s Hour on TCM, starring Audrey Hepburn and Shirley MacLaine. It’s about two teachers at a girl’s school who are accused of lesbianism with each other. A lightning storm begins outside the house as it’s playing, igniting the warm, southern humidity with brilliant flashes. The woods have this wonderful strobe effect as they light up, seconds before the thunderous crack hits nearby. The air is charged and the atmosphere is alive with the turmoil and violent tenacity of the passing weather.

And as the lightning dances outside, I watch as two women also experience their world crashing down around them. Thunder shakes the house as a little girl’s accusations begin to destroy these teachers' lives. The emotion onscreen is mixing with the atmospheric changes to create the ideal viewing experience. I nearly jump out of my seat several times as white hot tridents jab down into the land around us.

Thunder and lightning does wonders for the metaphorical and emotional weight of this film. At one point we actually lose the picture altogether for several seconds, but it only foreshadows the tragedy that is to come for these characters. I really don’t mind the blackout, because I’m sure this is what the characters are experiencing in the story anyway…their crystal clear picture of life suddenly blinking away into fuzzy confusion and blackness.

The movie is decent, if only for the performances. But the entire emotional experience tonight is magical, and I am nearly in tears at the end.

New Music in the Audio Section

I've put a couple of my latest tunes in the audio section on this page. Just click on the above "Audio" link and  you'll see them.

Here are the lyrics for both songs:

Jackie Went Away
(In memory of my cousin Becky--Rest in peace, I love you)

Sit down if you understand/I’m not here to hold your hand/
Only to comprehend and take the blame
General called the troops/Mother rang a bell for you/
Nothing new, you left a few, hope you hear it
I think you're gonna make me cry/Just a plank in my eye/
Find a way to make it die it won’t be long

Like a shade of gray, Jackie went away
Take a word to say, Jackie went away
I’m gonna make her pay, Jackie went away
Won't be back in May, Jackie went away from here

You say that life’s a mystery/We're all playing history/
I'm a vinyl LP in the groove
I don’t want to tag along/Find a hook in the song/
40 million can’t be wrong, they can’t be right
You left a blank in your gun/Like a TV rerun/
In the sun left to burn in my mind

Take a drink to your health/Though it might leave a welt/
From the belt holding up what’s left of me

Relatively Speaking

It was a cool September day, you checked me out at the Circle K
I was late for work, all I wanted was a roll of Certs
Well it took me by surprise, asking for my number when I cut in line
But I wrote it down--you said if I did I'd get your discount

Hello? Is that you already on my cell phone?

I guess you’re OK, you’re not bad in a desperate sort of way, relatively speaking
For a girl you’re in the top 103, relatively speaking
Don’t take it wrong but you’re sort of kinda almost cute, relative speaking
Because relatively speaking, I like you

Was it really the next day, quite early by the way,
When you called again? My expletive may have dropped a hint
But we did go out to eat, the drive-through at Wendy’s never seemed so sweet
Cause I made it clear, there was less to us than it appeared

Hello? Didn't we just have this conversation like five minutes ago?

Please just let it go-- it isn’t you
Please just leave me alone-- it isn’t you
Please get off the phone...OK it really is you

Music and Lyrics Copyright Michael Ray Music

Currently Listening A Boy Named Charlie Brown: The Original Sound Track Recording Of The CBS Television Special By Vince Guaraldi see related

Life's On Deck Circle

Currently Listening Weezer (Green Album) By Weezer see related

2:30am, Just Me and Night

I was going to write this in real time last night, but xanga was "closed," like every respectable operation should be at 2:30am. BUT, I say there should be an exception for artists. Anyone ever meet a "morning artist?" Didn't think so.

So it's like 2:30am, at my home studio (a glorified name for recording equipment in the corner of a basement room) and I'm screeching into a microphone trying to finish a new song, when I realize that screeching is probably not far from the truth. I mean, I kept hitting the record button and trying the vocal lick over and over again, but the result was always the same--not quite right (OK, it was downright bad, honestly). And because we've all heard that the definition of insanity is "doing the same thing but expecting different results," I decided to regain my sanity. Thus, like any intelligent musician, or artist for that matter, I make a creative choice to do something else with the part. If it ain't working, then try something that does...and in my case, I put a spoken word segment into the bridge instead of trying to hit notes that kept alluding me.

You know, there's something holy about the Middle of the Night, and I think it shows up on the canvas (be it a digital recorder, a keyboard and screen, or a stage). Night seems to seep into an artist's work, infecting it with ludicrous ideas that would never dare show up in the 9-5 world. It can wrap it's arms around you or tap you on the shoulder or even tickle you if it has to. It's a co-creator of art when it has to be, but it can also be a silent friend that doesn't intrude on the evening but simply sits back and observes while you madly chase your muse.

Last night, Ol' Night wouldn't let me go at 2:30am, insisting that I had just one more good idea left in me before I turn out the lights. It's usually right when it prods me to stay up later (Unlike a similar prodding from TV, junk food, or the internet).

Night's quickly becoming my best friend, especially since I'm finally starting to take myself seriously as an artist. But more on that in the days to come.